for those about to rock

create your own surreal life

a little off-topic, before i dig into the matter at hand: my favorite line from reality tv as of late comes from 'flavor of love''s resident nutjob, new york, who showed up at a competitor's door and said "i did a little research. you're a whore."

anyways, i'm a little disappointed with this season's cast on 'the surreal life'. no matter how you match them up, nowhere is there potential for a combustible chemistry even approaching the likes of janice dickinson and omarosa's simmering bitch-upsmanship epic from last season, nor does it appear this time around that a cupid high off the suffocating kitsch fumes will be fomenting any unholy unions with haphazard arrows, as he did with peter brady and america's last top model the season before that. there's just not enough spunk/instability in this bunch: rehab has smoothed the substance-amplified edges of nice-guy-at-heart c.c. deville, playgirl andrea lowell is a superfluous dope, transgendered alexis arquette isn't laying it on thick or doing anything to make her male castmates uncomfortable, smashmouth's steve harwell is a colossal bore and sherman helmsley goes through the motions with a sleepy detachment (this is admittedly awesome, though). the lone flashpoint hope here is conniving tawny kitaen, but she seems to have JUST tight enough a grip on the reins of reality (as in, actual, non-celebrealitied reality) not to succumb to a frothing meltdown.

ah well, there's always next season.

on that note, i threw together a hurried wish list for who i think i'd like to see sequestered to the surreal life nut house:

'kris' from 'kris kross'
paul 'pee-wee' rubens
rae dawn chong
christie hemme
marlon wayans
elvira
ed mcmahon

that creep pee-wee would be enough to make it a volatile season, though insane/maximum volume christie hemme and frankenstein sycophant ed mcmahon would certainly help matters along.

posted by jomilkman @ 7:44 AM